Sankalpa - Listening to Self
The last day of 2018
Looking back I see 364.5 days of adventure behind me and so many more to come.
Resolution versus Sankalpa
January starts with a bang!!!
New years at Cinderella’s Castle in Orlando, FL.
Full of hope, expectations, and resolutions. “I will lose weight, I will be more organized, I will …[insert yours here]…” At the stroke of midnight on New Year’s Eve we kiss our loved ones and with the new year we summon our utmost willpower and pledge to change, do better, be better. Somehow though, as January waxes on that spark we felt starts to fade.
Now I know almost nobody LOVES statistics but according to a poll performed by the Statistics Brain Research Institute: 42% of Americans reported never succeeding or failing on their resolutions when they set them each year. WHY!? We have the support, the will, the strength. We have set these goals and we imagine how much happier we will be when we get what we want. Perhaps it isn’t that we aren’t strong enough, just the way we frame our desires.
In a beautiful article from Yoga International, Kelly McGonigal suggests:
“Resolutions almost always fail because they start from the assumption that who you are is not good enough, and reinforce the mistaken belief that your happiness depends on acquiring what you want.”
The yogic tradition offers a subtle shift on how we think about “resolving.” So maybe this year, instead of making a list that starts with “I WILL….” Try this:
SAN - A connection to the highest truth within ourselves.
KAPLA - A vow to be followed above all others
The sankalpa practice begins from the premise that you already are who you need to be to fulfill your life’s truth. Instead of changing who we are, the practice of sankalpa teaches us to focus our minds, connect to our most heartfelt desires / our own personal truth / or as I refer to it here the true Self, and to channel the divine energy within ourselves. When we connect to our personal truth we don’t need to summon external will to realize it, the energy is already there.
let your true Self raditate - we already are all we need to be to fulfill our life’s truth.
Two aspects of resolution
A sankalpa can take two forms.
Firstly, is an acceptance of Self or a reflection of your true nature. This type of resolve or sankalpa is more encompassing than a traditional New Year’s resolution and doesn’t require change - it requires acknowledgement. It is simply a statement of who you are:
“I am adventurous, I am compassionate, I am beautiful, I am whole.”
This isn’t something we think about, that our intellectual mind can ponder, it is a deep understanding from within and the willingness to know and love our true Selves. When we arrive at a few “I am…” statements, they inform our mind of a direction to take in life or are already taking as we journey forward.
The second, is a specific intention or goal - perhaps this is more the kind we are used to making in a traditional New Year’s resolution. We often forget that when we discover our purpose, not everything happens at once, our life’s goals require milestones.
My personal work this year has been to value those little steps on my journey to accomplish my life goals and to calm the sense of impatience on the path. Each step is important. Setting specific intentions along the way are helpful to align choices made on a micro (moment-to-moment) scale that will ultimately align with the macro scale - my life goals.
Path on one of my favorite running trails outside of Cape Town - a rickety bridge sometimes has to be crossed.
Discovering your Self / Discovering sankalpa
My new connection with the ancient symbol of the Ouroboros (snake eating its tail) is rooted here. To read more about the Ouroboros, this website’s namesake, read the post here. It is an old symbol that represents infinity. The meaning for me comes in the understanding that “In the act of becoming, I already am.” We do not have to change ourselves, we don’t have to make something up, or go on a wild search for meaning - we simply need to listen.
Ouroboros - beautiful gift from my beautiful sister
To find Sankalpa the yogic tradition has three steps which traditionally are cultivated through meditation. However, I strongly believe that each individual has their own way of processing, listening, and accepting. This can be different for everyone - for me, I listen and understand Self with movement: yoga, running, riding my motorcycle. For others it is travel, reading, praying, talking to loved ones. How ever you arrive there, the three steps as described in the yogic tradition still hold true:
Sravana - willingness to hear the message of Self
Manana - welcoming the messenger in
Nididhyasana - the willingness to do what is required
Sometimes when we listen: we don’t hear anything or perhaps we are hearing a stream of ego driven or conditioned responses such as: shiny new car, smaller waist, larger bank balance. That is OK! Start there and don’t dismiss your thoughts as shallow or simple - these too can lead us to Self. Work with what comes up for you, explore it! Often this time of year a goal is “I want to lose weight.” What about losing weight appeals to you? Imagine how your life will be or how you will feel as a result of meeting that goal. Are you striving for a sense of physical well-being, self-love, health? What about your Self is longing to lose weight?
Another example, which I pull from Anne Douglas, a yoga therapist, is the intention to quit something: smoking, shopping, eating meat, or overeating. Investigate this intention deeper and ask what desire that behavior is currently trying to satisfy. Do you smoke, shop, eat meat, or overeat to seek peace of mind, freedom from pain, or the feeling of being accepted?
Anne says: “See if you can find a deeper hunger, a longing that’s asking to be nourished.” Her examples goes on to say: “If someone starts with, ‘I want to quit smoking,’ as they work with it, they’ll start to feel a deeper desire, such as, ‘ I want to take care of my body.’ Even further down the road, the sankalpa might become: ‘I love my body,’ or even ‘ I am love.’ It’s an evolution, but it still has the feeling of the initial intention to quit smoking.”
Slow Down - Everything doesn’t have to start and finish tomorrow
Declare your Sankalpa
Tomorrow is January 1, you may not be able to declare your sankalpa, understand what the Self is whispering to you, or be able to acknowledge your true heartfelt desires.
This is a process.
Don’t stress.
Remember in the act of becoming, you already are.
We identify with the classic resolution phrasing: “I WILL…” or “I WANT…” or “I WON’T…” Phrasing a goal this way lacks the truth of Self and perhaps is why commitment to them fades as the calendar days flip by. Remember our Ouroboros? In the act of becoming, we already are. For this reason, a traditional sankalpa is declared in the present tense. Instead of A —> Try B:
“I want to be more loving” —> “I am love”
“ I will not overeat.” —> “With love for my body, I eat mindfully.”
Stating your sankalpa in this way acknowledges the journey you have taken to listen to Self, the energy to discover your heartfelt desire / Self, and the will to do what is required to be all that is already inside you.
Grow the roots of your sankalpa
Reach into the sky and the ground below
Perhaps another reason our resolutions fall away as January creeps forward is the busy nature of our lives. When we refocus our perspective and start looking at a sankalpa / resolution NOT as something to fit into our busy life but as our life it is no longer a chore. The truest expression of Self is a fire burning inside, what starts as a spark needs fuel. An important aspect of the sankalpa practice is kindling this fire. We can repeat our intentions like an mantra / daily affirmation but ultimately it must be lived out and put into practice in our journey toward our life goals. Like a muscle, we can and must strengthen the ties to Self and the energy required to hold to our resolve.
With practice we become more sensitive to the whispers of Self and realize that every choice we make supports or undermines our resolve.
This is why the practice of mindfulness or slowing down to listen to Self is so important. Something simple like eating too much sugar may disrupt your energy, digestion, and sleep - yet how many times have we reached for that cookie sitting in the common area at the office without even thinking? If we don’t mindfully accept this intention, ignore Self awareness, and habitually eat sweets we are giving power to the part of ourselves that goes against our consciousness. Strengthen the space between impulse and action by pausing, taking a few deep breaths, and reciting your sankalpa.
Never forget to show compassion to the Self, when you perceive you are falling short or have lost your way. All steps on the path are still the path. Use instances that you have forgotten your sankalpa to support it. Missed opportunities to support Self can prepare us for future choices. Sometimes, I even go back and think of specific times my resolve was lost, I image what it would have felt like to allow compulsion or habit to undermine Self. Each time we chose growth, strength, and support - even in an imagined memory - we make the connection to Self more robust.
Today in yoga I was reminded that although we can make resolutions anytime of the year, generally it is this time of year when we have support. A community around us that is willing to help, that is also, striving to grow. So reach out! Ask if you have questions! Talk to others in your community yoga, work, school, church, sports team - this is a very personal process but we can learn so much from one another. And never forget:
In the act of becoming, I already am.
Happy 2019 Friends !!!